Lately, I’ve been feeling a little unseen and caught in the middle. Unclean, as I cling to my brittle thoughts. It got so bad and it got even harder. Neck deep, couldn’t go to my father. My mother’s around but it never feels like she’s home.
Face down in the dirt by my brother. Let down, wishing I had another. No one had my back at twelve years old. (Why now?). A sister stares. She doesn’t care, a mom who’s never really there. A broken heart, a broken home. I’m forced to face this on my own.
So if I’m wrong, why won’t you just tell me? But I don’t think that I’m the one to blame.
Is everything my fault? Is everything my fault?
I do. Isn’t it what you said, when you were young and newlywed. You said for better or for worse. (The worst keeps coming.) A broken vow. I don’t know how you could let each other down. Without trust, there’s no light to lead the way.
Where there’s a will, there’s a way to set you free. But my legs can’t carry me. I know I’m not the one to pick up the pieces.
Is everything my fault? Is everything my fault? Though I’m happy here for now, I’m looking for a storm in every cloud. Is everything my fault? (The worst keeps coming.) (But I don’t think that I’m the one to blame.) My fault. (You could let each other down.)
My brother made amends and I’m his best man. My sister’s states away, but her love is always sent. My mother finally came home to the family. My father was always there to catch me.
So as you lie awake tonight staring at the sky and the moonlight, with no one left to tell you it’s alright, waiting for the sun to rise. There’s so much left to live for in this life. Not every wrong will come to see a right. And everybody thinks so much easier when you’re young. When you’re young.
Is everything my fault? (I know I’m not alone.) Is everything my fault? (Picking up the pieces.)
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